Wednesday, April 28, 2021
Software Engineering Explained
How the customer explained it: tree swing, but with 3 vertical seats where it looks more like a rope ladder.
How the customer
How the project lead understood it: tree swing, but with the ropes tied to opposite branches so the seat just rests against the trunk.
How the project lead
How the analyst designed it: tree with a large gap where a section of the trunk is missing, with a swing in the trunk gap, and propped up with support braces.
How the analyst
How the programmer wrote it: tree with a swing lying on ground, the rope tied around trunk instead of branches.
How the programmer
What the beta tester received: empty noose hanging from a branch, where the swing should be.
What the beta tester
How the new team applied patches: tree swing in place, but blocked off with caution tape; the tree is bandaged with duct tape, supported by props, and there is a useless extra swing lying on the ground.
How the new team
How it was documented: empty landscape, with just shadows of where the tree and swing would be overhead.
How it was
When it was completed: a simple swing suspended by ropes, but the ground is snow-covered with a snowman, the tree bare of leaves.
When it was
What operations installed: one rope hanging from a branch, the swing seat dragging on the ground.
The disaster recovery plan: a shriveled tree bent-over under the weight of the swing, which is touching the ground.
How it performs under load: a swing with the seat broken in two, presumably from the butterfly which is hovering above it.
How it performs
How the customer was billed: a wooden roller coaster.
How the customer
What Marketing advertised: a bright swing, with a luxurious red pillow on the seat; the tree is a black silhouette against a solid green background.
How it was supported: a tree stump.
How it was supported
What the customer really needed: a tire-swing hung from a branch.
What the customer
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